Unit 5 - The Subtle Mind

                       The loving kindness exercise was a great exercise on getting me to be more conscious of those around me.  It helped me to focus not just on my own wellbeing but to be more aware of my family’s needs and to help me deal with my friend’s cancer.  It was not just about my inner self but beyond that.  The subtle mind exercise I felt was more about calming my mind and learning to turn the focus back into myself.  I had an easier time calming my mind for this exercise but I also think while doing this exercise I was very exhausted from a trying week of sickness from my kids, husband and myself.  We tend to always be running somewhere and my mind is in a constant state of “what’s next or what am I forgetting” so to calm my mind is soothing but can sometimes make me feel almost guilty.  Guilty for taking that time out of my schedule when I “should” be doing something else.  I think the loving-kindness exercise made me more aware of my feelings involved with my friend’s cancer diagnosis so I am struggling with that a bit, but it’s good to deal with it vs. push it back and have no emotion.  I felt so much more relaxed with the subtle mind exercise and think I may add this to the end of my day routine.

            Total wellness is when all things are balanced in the spiritual, physical and mental sides.  When I am not feeling well physically I notice that I am mentally more dragged down but I do tend to pray more to try and find a higher power to help me get through the situations.  I argue with myself on where I stand spiritually as I want it to be fulfilling and not just what my husband says or what my church says I should be doing for spiritual wellness.  I also notice that when I fall into the mental despair that comes with physical sickness it’s hard to pull myself back and get everything realigned.  I know personally that turmoil within the balance of mental, physical, and spiritual well-being can wreak havoc on your system until you are able to right the problem.  It seems the physical pains are worse, the mental function slows or forgets easily and I feel like I am lost spiritually sometimes.  It’s been a hard couple of weeks for me personally so I am starting my track back on getting everything balanced.